Creating Peace Through Balance
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Peace, Love, and the B Word

Watching someone you love go through a hard time can be painful and upsetting, especially when you can feel what they are going through or intuitively know what they need. I’m not talking about coming from a place of judgement or your own experience. I’m talking about genuine intuitive knowing of and feeling into what they need to make the situation better.

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For those of us who are empathetic, watching another unravel and witnessing their unwillingness to make changes is even more painful than going through the situation ourselves.
We are not only feeling their pain, but we feel completely powerless to do anything to change it. We see the path that will lead them to happiness and peace, but cannot force them to walk it.


So many people that I know (myself included) have at some point been so deeply affected by another person’s pain that we have become shells of ourselves, doing everything in our power to help them to the point of our own depletion. One day, we look in the mirror and don’t recognize ourselves anymore. We are super thin or holding a lot of weight, not sleeping, not taking care of ourselves—health, hair, skin, etc.

While it is true that we need to give another the dignity of his own process, it is not true that we are completely powerless.

Here are 5 things that I’ve found help me maintain my peace and balance in the midst of someone else’s insanity, in no particular order:

  1. Let him know that you Love him no matter what. Let him know that you are always going to Love him, no matter what choices he makes. It really helps each of us to know that there is one person out there who will not judge us and will be there if and when the bottom drops out.

  2. Keep your mouth shut. (This includes your energy.) Really. Keep your mouth shut unless asked for your opinion. This will prevent you from getting swept into the whirlwind of he said, she said. IF you are going to say something, say it directly to the person, and not behind his back.

  3. Pray and send positive thoughts, whatever this looks like for you. Pray for the best possible outcome for the person. Note: What you think is the best possible outcome might not be right for him. Be open to what the Universe has in store and let go of your limited perspective.

    If prayer is not your thing, send Love, visualize, and FEEL him being happy, healthy, full of joy, and free.

  4. Employ boundaries. Manage your own energy by deciding what is right for you in terms of things like communication, exposure, and setting. Set up your experience so that you do not feel depleted at the end of an interaction. If a conversation is wearing on you, excuse yourself and take a breather.

  5. Remove yourself from the situation. There are some times where you might just have to remove yourself completely. This does not mean that you close off the connection of Love, but it does mean that you Love yourself enough to do what is best for you at the time. This could be temporary, or long-term, depending on the situation.
In order to show up as your best self and to be able to hold the energy and the light for someone else, you need to have boundaries. This is a dirty word to so many HSPs. It seems counterintuitive for so many of us who feel that it is our Purpose to help others to say, “That is enough” and stop a situation before our energy is sucked dry and we are depleted.

Boundaries are important, and it is equally important to remember that they are moveable. You can pick and choose where thy go and when they are needed and do not have to explain them to anyone else.

Trust me on this. I’ve tested it. As long as you put Love first (for yourself and others) things will always work out for the best.



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theresa@healthyvibrantyou.com

Why the Divine Feminine Would Not Let Me Watch Gymnastics

Before I say anything, let me first say that this whole year has been an undertaking in embodying feminine energy and anchoring the Divine Feminine. Let me also say that if I had realized what I was signing on for, I might have run screaming in the opposite direction. Thank Universe that she knows how to package these experiences in an appealing way that makes me go, "OOOOOOOH, shinyyyyy!" and then *BOOM* suddenly I am eyeballs-deep in transformation.


Feminine Energy?

Each of us—no matter how we identify gender-wise—is made up of masculine and feminine energy. When I refer to the masculine energy, I am referring to the pushing energy. The "let's get stuff done energy." The "work harder, more, do it NOW" energy. There great benefits to this energy, unless it becomes out-of-balance. Then we have a situation like our current patriarchal society—where we are living primarily in fear, separateness, unconsciousness, and, ultimately, control.

When I refer to the feminine energy, I am speaking of the energy of compassion, creation, incubation, oneness, love energy. This, too, can be problematic when out-of-balance because there is not much action.

Both are needed in conjunction for us to function at our best—individually, and societally.

kjfmiller
Image © KJFMiller

Where the Olympic Games Come In


This year, while watching the Olympics, I found myself utterly captivated by the swim events. I used to be a swimmer, and my body and all of her cells were remembering what it felt like to glide through the water as I was watching. The movements were long, fluid, powerful, and filled with grace—all aspects of feminine energy. The athletes seemed to be working in harmony with the water, though I knew how much energy it took for each of them to complete a race.

Each of them exuded happiness and peace. They expressed a Love and complete devotion for what they were doing and all of the work it took to get there.

Then, one night, I finally caught a gymnastic event. I was super excited because I also used to be a gymnast, and these have always been my favorite Olympic events. (My gymnastic career ended at the ripe old age of 7, but that is a story for another day.)

As soon as the beam routines started, I realized something had shifted.
These 5 things became apparent:


1. The masculine energy of pushing runs this sport. Every movement that each gymnast made appeared forced, strenuous, and staccato. AND, the effects of stress, training, and pressure were showing on their faces and their bodies.

2. These athletes are not happy. I could feel the intense pressure on them from their coaches and from themselves. No matter how big of a smile was on any of their faces, their eyes and bodies were filled with pressure and tension. It was so obvious to me this year, which got me wondering, “How much pressure and tension was I carrying, that I never before noticed this?”

3. People have the ability to change their physical appearance through focus. My lifelong admiration for gymnasts gave me the idea of what an athletic body looked like—short, squat, very muscular, and slightly masculine. And this is what I would look like every time I started going to a gym regularly.   

Over the course of a couple of years, I have changed my idea of what an athletic build looks like and the way I work out. My exercise pace has become much more regular, easy, and grace-filled. (It is also a thousand times more effective. Again, more to come on that at a later date!) My body has changed. It has become longer, more toned, and I have begun to look much more feminine.

4. This no longer feels good. Just like with swimming, my body was again feeling the movements of the athletes. Every time there was a landing, I felt the effects of the pounding and gravity on my system. This was all rooted in a very masculine energy and was no longer resonant in my system. The routines were no longer appealing to my eye, which made it very uncomfortable for me to watch.

5. When it is time to let something go, Bless and Release. I could have sat there and forced myself to watch the rest of the routines, but after the third one I was very uncomfortable and just wanted out. As a Highly Sensitive Person, my instinct is usually to continue to watch because they put so much time and effort into training, despite the negative effect this would have on me. Instead, I sent them well wishes from my heart and shut off the tv to go do something that fed my soul.

There are people in the world (and probably reading this) for whom gymnastics is a beautiful form of expression, and I honor that. I honor the sport and the talent and work it takes to get to the level of excellence that the Olympics require. However, because I am spending so much more time with the Divine Feminine than ever before, it no longer resonated with me. It is time for a much more fluid, supported, and flowing way of life.

I give myself permission to move forward and let go of what no longer serves me.

I give myself permission to feel into and experience what is right for me in this moment.

I give myself permission to let it be easy.

Where can you do the same for you?

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theresa@healthyvibrantyou.com

That Time a Seeming Snafu Worked Out for the Best

Sometimes, out of a seeming snafu, the best things can happen. Last month, the Angel Hour had a HUGE technical glitch which resulted in 99% of the callers being on one conference line, and me being on another.

WHAAAAAAAT?
Initially, my reaction was very human. "HOW are there so few people on this call when so many signed up?" "What if this subject matter is not interesting to people and I am the only one perceiving things this way?" (The topic was Creating Balance in an Imbalanced World.)

I got my head together by reassuring myself that the Angels have NEVER in my life steered me wrong, no matter how strange the directive seemed at the time. This steered me back to the reason that I was doing this in the first place. The Angels had some very important information to share with those who wish to create the world as they want it to be. 
wisdom-92901_copyWhen things don't go according to plan, it is how we react that makes all the difference. Life is unpredictable and sometimes the only thing that you get to choose is your own behavior. In this particular situation, I knew that the show must go on and that I would figure it out later. The time and date were given to me by the Angels, so the information needed to come through, no matter what. I went on with the call and shut off the thoughts involving self doubt and self judgement. It ended up being a beautiful call with incredible messages coming through. 

Peace and balance in the outer world come from peace and balance in the inner world. The Angels really drove that message home to me by requiring exactly that to get me through this call. They were calling me to live my medicine. Without being able to balance, center, and re-focus, I would not have been able to hear the messages that they were giving me and share them.

The Learning
Sometimes, it takes a bit of an extreme situation to enable you to learn things that you might not have known otherwise. Had this not happened, I might never have realized:

1. How many people care. Even though we are surrounded by people, we don't always realize this. I cannot tell you how many emails, calls, texts, and messages I had when I finished the call. All from lovely people who were checking on me. Remember...in their world, I just didn't show up. They had no idea I was leading the call on another conference line! 

2. How responsible people know I am. If I say something is starting on this date at one, people know I will be there waiting for them at exactly that time. This is good to know, because it wasn't always this way.

3. How much Peace and Unity are actually desired in this world. If you listen to the mainstream media, you would most likely think the exact opposite. When the angels give us an opportunity to center and re-balance out inner world, so many of us show up. Remember, it only takes 1/2 of 1% of the population to shift our consciousness and hold it to create a huge shift in the consciousness of the entire world. 

4. No matter what, we are human first. As humans, we naturally thrive in community—and with the help of others. We can't manage everything on our own, and just being in community with like-minded people helps us to come out feeling better, stronger, and more supported. 
(And, on a personal note: Having an assistant to manage details is a lovely place to start.)

5. Every moment is a new opportunity to practice ahimsa, or non-violence in thought, word, and action. When things go wrong, it is very easy to jump into self-criticism, which usually involves some aspect of violent language. "You are such an __(insert expletive of choice here)__." Knowing that absolutely everything happens for a reason, and the silver lining will be shown to you afterwards is a great place to start to shift your energy from judgement to compassion. 
(If this seems difficult for you, know that I FULLY trust it and have been shown that this is the case over and over again in my life.)

What I want you to know is that I SEE YOU. I have heard your desire to make the world a better place, and I am fully committed to bringing you any information that I can to enable you to do just that. I am so grateful for you, and your willingness to stand up in strength and service on behalf of the world as it is now, and all future generations. 

For that reason, I am re-doing this call on Thursday so these messages to be brought to you LIVE. The angels will also be answering your questions, so bring them if you have them. If you are working at the time, sign up anyway—you can always just listen in if you have the chance.

Click here to sign up and receive access information to the FREE call.

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theresa@healthyvibrantyou.com

“When things don't go according to plan, it is how we react that makes all the difference.”


theresa@healthyvibrantyou.com

“When things don't go according to plan, it is how we react that makes all the difference.”


theresa@healthyvibrantyou.com

Get Outside and Connect With Your Bliss!

There are moments in life when each of us all feels separated from our humanity. To be honest, by the end of last week, I was living from that space—feeling disconnected, existing to run from appointment to appointment, place to place—a slave to my calendar. This often happens when I get caught up in the humdrum routine of the day-to-day for too long, forgetting to make the time to look around and remember the things that bring me enjoyment.

What I notice about myself and my clients is that we have a LOT of responsibility. We are good at responsibility. We take it on willingly because we are able to handle and juggle more than most people. The hard part is when we are focused on all of those responsibilities, we sometimes forget to factor ourselves into the mix.

When we make the time—even if it is just 5 minutes—to do something that we enjoy, it makes us feel more alive. We are instantly brought back to a place where we can breathe deeply and remember why the heck we are so passionate about helping other people in the first place—because we are all connected.

ShannonPifkoFreeImagescom_copy
Image ©ShannonPifko.FreeImages.com

I remedied this situation in the fastest way I know how.
I spent my entire 4-day weekend outdoors. I'm not talking about camping, because glamping is actually more my style. I'm talking about sitting under a tree while reading, paddle boarding, handstands in the grass, eating outside with friends and family.


Getting back to nature is a really great shortcut to bringing your entire system back into the most balanced state it can be in at any given time. Over the course of the weekend, I remembered that I am at my best and most functional when I spend about 75% of my time outdoors.

Here are just a handful of the health benefits that venturing into the great outdoors (or onto your balcony) hold for you:

Vitamin D: The fastest way for your body to absorb the Vitamin D it needs to keep you healthy is through the skin. Being out in the sun, even if only for 15 minutes in the morning and late evening will boost your Vitamin D levels. Note: If you are wearing sunscreen, or makeup or lotion containing sunscreen, your skin will not be able to absorb Vitamin D from the sun.

Better Sleep: Spending too much time inside and away from natural light can alter your circadian rhythms, thus disrupting sleep patterns. Exposure to sunlight has been shown to help recalibrate these sleep cycles and improve sleep quality overall.

Fresh Air: Indoor air pollutants are far worse for your health and are at far greater levels (25-62% higher) than outdoor air pollutants in almost every area of the world. Being outdoors also naturally causes us to take deeper breaths because we are away from the things that cause us stress—unless you are being chased by a bear. So if you are taking that lunch walk, leave your smartphone at your desk.

Grounding: Put your bare feet on the grass and tell me you don't feel more grounded! Scientifically speaking, not only does standing barefoot on the earth help regulate the polarity of your body, but it has an anti-inflammatory and energizing effect on it, as well.

Exercise: Let's face it, if you are outside, chances are that you are going to get more exercise than if you are sitting inside. This can look as simple as walking in and out of the house (probably up and down stairs) to get the food you've prepared for your guests, or an impromptu game of frisbee. [True Story. This happened this weekend and ended with me chucking the frisbee over a fence.]

With all of these health benefits, how did I FORGET that I needed to spend a lot of time outdoors in order to function well? This sort of thing happens to each of us when we are able to focus on the Whole. We sometimes forget about ourselves.



When we see and know the Connectedness of all, it is a really beautiful thing. It is important for us, however, to remember that each of us is also a piece of that Whole. When we are in a state of happiness and bliss, things flow better, we are better manifestors, we ripple those feelings out into the Collective, and we become living examples of Balance.


In order to show up as our best selves to have and hold the energy for all that we have to do each day, we need to remember to connect in with what brings us joy. Remember, at any moment, you can begin to return to center and health by getting outside and taking some breaths.



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theresa@healthyvibrantyou.com

Want to make the world a better place? Here are 5 things you probably forget to do.

As people who feel called to serve the world in a very deep way, we often burn the candle at both ends—alternating between states of superhuman productivity and hiding under a blanket with the blinds drawn to re-charge our batteries. This is often because our Work does not feel like work. We feel accomplished and balanced when we are working toward a goal that makes the world better in some way.

The fact is, that our Work IS work. It requires our focus, and very often a lot of energy movement. We are often working for what we LOVE on top of, or in addition to, a job that we already work full-time. This means we are sometimes already tired, but that we are so devoted and dedicated, that we forget about ourselves and our physical bodies in the process.

Image courtesy of Michael Elliott at FreeDigitalPhotos.net
Image courtesy of Michael Elliott at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

The key here is to see ourselves as pitchers full of water. We pour our water into all of the glasses around us—people, work, situations. When we run out of water, we are depleted and we have absolutely nothing to give to others. The goal is to always have water (energy) in your pitcher. Whether your Work is parenting, social justice, channeling, healing, or anything else, the principle is the same.

Here are 5 things to remember to that can help you to remain balanced and give you more energy to accomplish your Work:

1. Eat. Sometimes, when deep in the throes of working on something we are passionate about, we forget to eat. Sometimes, we just feel we "don't have time to eat." Other times, we forget that we are as important as the people and causes we are nurturing and don't make the time to be sure that we have the proper foods prepared and available to us. We get to the point of "I NEED TO EAT NOW" and grab whatever is fast and/or on-hand—EVEN if we are allergic to it!

You will see, maybe in the mirror, that a lot of people out there who you perceive as having a huge life mission either hold extra weight, are out of shape, or look emaciated and drained. Many even alternate between these stages. (Aside: food is not the only reason for this. There are energetic boundaries to be addressed at a later time that come into play here, as well.)

Taking the time to feed ourselves properly does a few things:

• It changes subtle lack-mentality that sabotages us. Saying that we don't have enough time or that there are not enough hours in a day for what we need to accomplish keeps us living in the illusion of lack.

• By fueling ourselves with the proper foods—as fresh and seasonal as possible—we create the most potential energy for our bodies to function and remain healthy.


2. Sleep. Many times, we ignore the signs that our bodies are tired and need to rest. (This is especially common in those of us who have spent a lot of time working in an office environment.) Forcing ourselves to continue working when our bodies say otherwise is actually a form of violence against the self. At the very least, it makes us less productive and we can easily spend an hour or two on something that should only have taken 10 minutes.

Getting a full night's sleep strengthens out immune system, allows the nervous system to re-set itself properly, and helps mood. Plus, resting when we need to rest allows us to come back to our Work with sharper focus and be much more productive.

3. Breathe. This is normally the first thing to go out the window when we are being challenged or are working on something that requires our undivided attention and focus. Simply put, our bodies need oxygen to function—each cell, organ, and neuron. When we are constantly breathing in a shallow way, we are depriving ourselves of a basic nutrient that we need to function properly. Just taking pause and breathing a couple of deep breaths is enough to calm the nervous system and re-focus the mind.

What I've learned is that if I am not breathing properly, I am exerting more of my own will and energy, instead of allowing the Guidance to flow to and through me.

4. Move. Many of us are dawn to spiritual practices (like kundalini yoga and meditation) over other kinds of practices and would rather invest time there. This is great, and these things may be necessary to your growth and development, but they often involve long periods of sitting or being still. The truth is, we are all in a physical body, and one of the things the physical body needs to function properly is movement. For this reason, it is important to balance these periods of sitting with periods of movement—whatever that looks like for you.

Moving the physical body is also a quick way to get energy moving. If you feel resistance to moving, take it to meditation and ask yourself, "Where is it that I am resisting change in my life?" and you will very likely unblock yourself!

5. Ground. It seems that we highly sensitive people spend a LOT of time disconnected from our bodies.

There are many reasons why we become ungrounded, but the hard part is making sure that we take the time to ground again. We can only really be strongly rooted in what we are here to do if we have both feet firmly on mother earth. This grounded energy is what needs to be harnessed for manifestation and it is the missing ingredient for so many of us.

As we feel called to go out and help the world, it is easy for us to lose sight of ourselves and what we need in and from it. As highly spiritual people, we are used to going "upward" for guidance and not grounding downward into the earth, but this is what is necessary in order to manifest our big plans and dreams in this reality. As we practice groundedness, we will naturally become more in-tune with our bodies and hear what they are asking for. Taking good care ourselves in the physical reality ensures that we will have the strength and energy to go forth and carry out the Work we know we are called to do, as well as all of the other things that require our time and attention.

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